Start Doing Things That Make You Uncomfortable

As an introvert, it is easy to slip into self isolation.

Although I am social, it is hard for me to maintain habits that keep me social, especially since i don’t have many close friends. Everywhere I go, I see people in pairs or groups. I rarely ever see anyone alone and I see smiles on the groups’ faces.

Being a college student that lives on campus, it often feels as if I live in a bubble and it can get pretty lonely. Believe me, I have tried to find friends, but I am too hard on myself and think that I am unworthy and slip out of touch with them.

I have accepted being alone, however that doesn’t mean that I have to be a hermit all the time. I can do things that others do in groups and I can be stronger because of it. I realized that many people are always in groups because they are too uncomfortable to do things alone. I’d like to encourage all of the lonely introverts like myself to go out and do things that make you uncomfortable and set the example that you can do fun things by yourself!

I’d like to share my story and my experience with doing uncomfortable things and trying again even when I think I looked dumb.

I started going to the gym early September. I focused only on myself and did all of my workouts with my headphones on and everyone else tuned out. This isn’t out of the ordinary if you have been to a public gym before: everyone is doing their own thing. I was comfortable with that, but once a week I would hear music coming from a group exercise room with a lot of girls dancing alongside an instructor. One night after running my mile I sat down on a bench and watched the end of their session and thought it would be something fun to do if only I had someone to go with.

After that night I thought about that group exercise class for the rest of the week, it was something I really wanted to try even as just a supplement to my regular workout, and I decided the following week I would go even though I had no one to go with.

Photo by Keenan Constance on Pexels.com

At first I was determined, but the closer I got to the gym the more I felt like backing out. The anxiety was finally hitting my senses along with all of the negative thoughts trying to convince me that uncomfortable and new meant unsafe. I started feeling as if I was going to suck at dancing and embarrass myself, or that i was going to be the only person there without a friend to dance beside, and the thoughts spiraled on. I finally got to the room and I stood outside.

I almost didn’t go, I was ready to just turn around and go do my regular workout, but I told myself that I just had to try it one time and if it was a flop then I didn’t have to go back. I walked inside and saw that I wasn’t the only lone person there. I was freaking myself out for nothing.

While I wasn’t the best at the dances since it was my very first time doing any sort of group exercise, I still had a lot of fun and if I looked around I could see that I wasn’t the only one messing up from time to time. Once the pressure came off and I didn’t take myself so seriously it was a lot of fun and I wanted to go back the next week.

It has been four months since then, and I still attend dance class every week. I still go alone, and I am completely okay with that.

Everyone is worried about themselves, and although it can be lonely doing most things by yourself that doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t do it anyway. Besides, how can you potentially meet a new friend if you don’t first brave the unknown?

Do the thing that makes you uncomfortable: Go to the movies alone, go to the mall alone, attend a public event alone, anything that you’ve wanted to do but have held off on because you don’t have anyone do to it with, do it!

You only have to try it once, and there’s a chance you’ll feel more confident about yourself and continue to do things for yourself, by yourself. So take a deep breath, and get out there.

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